Editing

I've been looking for ways to improve my mystery story where the narrator was reliving the same moment of realization i was writing it down in my notebook whether I should take him out of the room earlier and continuing the story from there I just don't know where to put this room at in the world.

Short story comments

I was reading over some of the comments my cassmates made about the 2 pages we brought in for last class, the main issues they had with my work was that in some cases where the narrator should have problems with his vision things should not be as quickly recognizable. The narrator should be more disoriented in speech and description but if the narrator is recounting a past experience these things could be clearer in description as he is recalling it.  The progress that I would want to make is give him a more confusing account to draw the reader in more because what I strive for is to make the reader feel the same rush the narrator is experiencing so that my work becomes a page turner that the reader can't put down.

One poem I like

Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening

by Robert Frost

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village, though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.


My little horse must think it's queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.


He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there's some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.


The woods are lovely, dark, and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

 Poem taken from, poetry.org
I like this poem because I heard the last four lines used in one of my favorite movie, Death Proof.  Since then whenever I read this poem I hear the voice of the character to who said it and it send a chill down my spine every time.

My first blog

http://www.webterrace.com/shakespeare/sonnets.htm
The link I provided, is a complete list of Shakespeare's Sonnets.  I enjoy redaing them very much, because of not only the form, but how the story is easily followable.  Also I like how Shakespeare deviates from the Petrarchan style of talking about the perfect beauty.